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I'm turning into someone I really despise.
2009, what a year.
So many things bad are happening to me, this year.
Previous years, things haven't got this bad.
I've shown a new side of me, to everyone I know.
I don't think anyone likes it, because I sure don't.
I don't even recognise myself anymore.
Stupid bullshit.
So many people are dying & the thought of death sends shivers through my body.
End of so many friendships because of bad decisions.
& last night, I did something bad and now i regret it.
Gah, and I feel like complete shit.

I'm sick of the people around me.
I'm sick of having to play the waiting game, 
but I have no other choice.

I should just dig a hole and die in it --'
Today is the worst day, no joke.
He hasn't been on all day.
Waiting & waiting & waiting for you to come online :/

Now I guess that some things happen for a reason
but I can't see how this has a brighter side.




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